Where it all started...

I believe this is the time to continue writing about what happened since the last post, moreover, this is the month where it all started...

*continue from previous post*

I was really looking forward to start my first conversion with him, but when the moment finally come true, I am just stuck for words. I just do not know where to begin. It was difficult, as I can see he don't tend to ask many constructive question. Ok, I don't blame him. He was not as keen as I do.

SG was trying to bridge our connection, his conversation usually hover on our similarity. As I mentioned before, Latte is just not keen to know about the similarities and in fact he find it annoying.

Being stuck for words, I just ramble whatever that comes into my mind, I remembered I start with telling about myself, about my past, in fact I was continuing for non stop and I find it to be kinda wrong. Why am I exposing so much to someone I just get to know?

All I got from him was...

"Awww..."

Every reply of his come with "Awww..."

It starts to annoy me a little, my first impression was that he must be the feminine and bitchy type!

I still remembered his profile picture on MSN, the guy with the DSLR wearing a blue polo tee. I suddenly just felt we will not get along after all and he definitely will not see anything in me.

We did talk a bit, and somehow we are talking among ourselves and ignoring SG. He complained that he is kinda annoyed with SG @.@

I do not remember how our first conversation ended, if I not mistaken he need go sleep and went offline after wishing good night. Did he even wish good night? LOL!

After that, I was complaining to SG on why he need to reply everything with "awww..."?

The first conversation was not a fruitful one. My hope on him kinda diminish. I did not continue having much thought.

Why would he like me? People like him tend to find guy like me too dull and boring for their liking...

With that, I just moved on a little from this guy and finding no reason to go online, I did not keep in touch with him for few days.

If we both ever online, I just remembered having really short question and I just went offline after receiving my answer.

Not even a goodbye i think?

Till today, this has been the evidence he hold strongly that I am the cold one who seems unapproachable!

How can that be? I always think he is the cold hearted one! He didn't even show any sign of being interested in me. He did not even ask for my Facebook add!

No major conversation, not even on New Year eve.

Until the very beginning of this year... :)

-Darlie-

Latte ^^

Dear Latte,



Love,

Darlie

A stranger named Latte ^^

It all started exactly towards the end of December, it was during my relief moment from the trouble I got myself into and after the dreadful final exams of mine. At that point of time, I wasn't thinking much but enjoying every bits of my holiday and feeling grateful that the worst is finally over. Year 2010 definitely started out good but gets rough towards the end.





I was catching up with SG after not keeping in touch with him for a few months. Although we had lost contact for a while, the reconnection has suddenly brought back many conversations and gossips into our friendship. He is a brother figure to me and I certainly could share with him almost everthing. I could still remember that we had our random phone conversation one afternoon and he told me something random that got my interest and curiosity all hiked up for the day.


It seems like during our lost in touch moment, he had found a replacement of me. It was a random blogger he recently known.





The first thing he asked me was, "Do you know who is Latte?"





"Latte??", I have no idea at first who this person was but after fetching more info I knew that such person exist and I admitted I have stalked his profile before on some dating website. The reason why I knew a stranger named Latte existed is because Latte happened to be a close friend of my high school mate.





In fact, I know such person named Latte existed even a year back, he has this profile picture of him in white posting like a ninja =.=! ok, it looks like a ninja pose to me..lol. I do not know exactly how he looks like and was certainly not interested in him. LOL





SG: Do you know I was talking to Latte few times on MSN and the more I talked to him, the more I felt like whatever he said sounds familiar to me and it seems like I have heard those words before from somewhere.


Me: Huh?


SG: I proceeded to ask about his about his family background and his horoscope and was in disbelief that it was identical to yours. That is when I knew I have just found your long lost twin!


Me: Really? OMG! I cannot believe that! You must introduce him to me!





We were busy discussing about this long lost twin of mine and SG showed me his FB and his blog. Latte's FB was privatised and I could not get much info about him except for the About Me that SG helped to copy paste to let me read. After reading his About Me and his blog, I could certainly conclude that he and me does have a lot in common and I was still in disbelief!!





I kept thinking about him for the whole day and in my mind I was really looking forward to knowing him. I somehow has this feeling that he and me will make good friends or at least be interested in each other. Maybe we could become brothers?? Lol..I always wish I had someone my around my age that I can relate to.





SG told me that this Latte guy usually will not be online in the afternoon or maybe only a short while, he is usually active during the night. I have quite irregular online timing and there wasn't any opportunity for SG to introduce him to me. SG has started mentioning about me to Latte and from the feedback I got, Latte only keep saying, "I am not unique anymore :("





Somehow that response demotivated me a little as I felt that Latte is not really happy knowing there is someone like him. SG has showed him my FB and I do not get any friend request from him. The only thing he responsed when he saw my FB profile picture was, "Ooo.." and nothing more :( There wasn't any feedback from SG that Latte was keen in knowing me.





I was thinking maybe I am not his type? I admitted that I have nothing special that capture people's interest. I have my own ego and did not want to send any friend request to Latte on FB. I find it pointless to have someone on FB that you do not even talk to or know >

Through out the time, the only info I got about Latte was from SG. Later SG even met up with Latte and told him about me. Latte's response was, "I'm not unique anymore :("

28/12/2010- SG made a long list and posted on FB of our things in common between Latte and me. I was even more interested when I saw how many common things we have. However, Latte's response was kinda cold and it seems like he is not interested in the list or at me :(

It was later at night when I was chatting with SG on MSN and he suddenly went, "OMG! Latte is finally online! Are you ready to meet your long lost twin?"

Of course I was anxious when I heard that, and I straight away told him, "I want!" But I was not ready and do not know what I want to say to Latte. I have lots to say, but do not know where to start from :(

And then before I knew it..

Latte: Hi!

Me: Hi Latte!

-Darlie-

A Dream Come True

I knew all these while I am searching for the one,
I am always doubtful when people told me I will be able find someone where I can utter those sweet words,
I never thought I would fell for someone again after being numb for such long period of time,
I am seeking but without any hope and expectation,
Until you came and everything changed...
-Darlie-

The Frustration;

The missing kills;

It is time to fly off. Headed to the airport in the morning and bid Darlie good bye via SMS. I kept telling myself, "If and only he could come along...". I'm sure it would happen to any lovebirds rookies lol!

Upon arrival, it was already close to midnight. The wind was strong and icy cold. Again I thought, "If and only he could be here, holding my hand and keeping me warm.

..". Reality hit me and I snapped out of my day dream. Hopped on to the bus and headed to the hotel.

No phone line, no internet availability; no source of communication! Frustrated, I was. Since it was so late, there was nothing much that I could do. Went to bed missing him.

...

***

The next morning, It was Valentine's Day. It has always been my dream to really spend time with my loved one on this day. Some of you may ask what's so special about this day. Everyday can be Valentine's. But that won't affect me at all. I just want to feel the lovey day. Sadly and unfortunately, I was like more than a hundred miles away.

In the evening, I finally found out that there is internet available at the mini business centre in the hotel! Quickly, I opened my facebook. It was around 11pm back in Malaysia and I just had to wish Darlie 'Happy Valentine's Day!!' at least. Signed in, and I saw a message from him.

***

Picture from Darlie

***

My night ended sweetly by reading his message. *Smiles widely*

xoxo,

-Latte-

The confession;

The morning when I woke up from bed, I felt so peaceful; no worries about anything. The only thing that hit my mind was Darlie. Well, we just had our first date yesterday. Couldn't stop thinking about him. Hence, I texted him "Good morning!".

Spent the whole afternoon doing things slowly as there is no need to rush. Of course, I had to pack as the next day, I have to fly off for holiday. Sadly, Darlie could not come along otherwise it would be like the perfect holiday. But it is all okay.

Just before midnight, or close to midnight, I was still chatting with Darlie. Then it hit me! I knew I could not fly off peacefully without knowing something....

"Before anything, I need to clarify something....."

*3o seconds*

"I think it is pretty obvious where we are heading right?", I asked.

According to Darlie, he was so worried when I said that. I guess the way of me putting my sentences are just bad! Haha.

"Do you want me to be honest?", Darlie asked.

Like seriously... I think we're both messing each other's minds. He was scared that I needed to clarify that we are friends. And he made me think that all these while I'm just hallucinating about the progress of a relationship.

"I like you, Latte!", Darlie confessed.

I do not know how to express myself properly, but bottom line, I knew I was in joy. I confessed too, that I do like him. Pretty cliche love confessions. It was his first relationship and sort of my second. The next thing I know, my internet line got disconnected. I couldn't resist waiting for it to be connected and I just called him straight. We talked and talked till past midnight.

I was so in joy that I could barely sleep. Not really interested in the trip but more towards Darlie. Then I realized, making things clear or not does not make any difference as I would still think a lot lol.

And so it begins...

xoxo,

-Latte-

The first date;

It was a peaceful evening on that day. The weather wasn’t very hot and it was nice to be at home. (You don’t get such good weather very often especially in Malaysia). And when I am at home, I will face the computer more than I face people; mum and dad especially. Not that I am a totally bad son, it’s just that I tend to stay in my room a lot *smiles*.

You must be wondering what much is there to do facing the computer the whole day? Well there isn’t very much to do honestly. I admit I live a boring life. I guess facebook would be partially my online best friend! I am with it at any possible ways. Without my online bestie, I’m totally lost…*gulps*. Just kidding.

I would spend time chatting or rather not but on that particular day, I was actually chatting with Darlie via msn. Ever since the frequent texts and morning calls we exchange over and over again; flooding the sms inbox with just his name and was forced to delete all posts, it became very addictive I would say. A good one, definitely never a bad one.

I just felt so comfortable talking to him and I guess that I have fallen for him unintentionally? Too fast you may think but my feelings did not have any doubts towards him. I trust my feelings as it has somehow never failed me at the accuracy rate of 95%? Perhaps it’s a typical Cancer-ian thing. It’s a mystery that will never have an answer; humans are the most complicated creature in the universe.

At one point of the conversation, Darlie asked me out for dinner. Excited, I was and instantly agreed without any hesitations. He said he will take me out for dinner at this restaurant that he has always been curious about that restaurant’s concept which is located in the city centre of K.L.

Rendez-Vous D’amour, Vendredi 9p.m.

Darlie was free on that day. The whole day to be in fact as was as busy as a bee. Woke up early in the morning to run some errands with his mum and other stuffs. If it was me, I’d definitely run out of energy. I am an old man already you see. He said he would come and get me at 7p.m. but was a little late due to still completing his other tasks. Knowing that he should be extremely exhausted and it was getting pretty late, I asked if he would like to change it to another day instead. I did not have the heart to see him being so tired after a long day and still had to bring me out for dinner.

“Nooo! Cannot… I’ve waited for this day until very ‘sanfu’ (torturous)”, he replied.

Hmm~ Adds another point to the suspicion *giggles*.

Since he is so keen for this date, I did not want to disappoint him by turning him down. It was the first time for him to come to my place and directly fetch me. When he was almost arriving, I was already waiting by the road for him.

“Don’t worry, you’re arriving soon. You’ll see a crazy guy standing in the middle of the road and that’s me”, I told him on the phone.

Hopped into his car and we went to the destination. I thought things were going to be awkward and stuff as communications through the net and being in real life is totally two different things. But we talked. And talked. And talked. Though there were the silence moment, there was still no awkwardness, that’s so he claims *smirks*.

The dinner was definitely a huge disappointment. Don’t be mistaken at this point. It was not Darlie who was being a bad date or vice versa. The restaurant was. It was rather small and the food served was quite not up to standard as from what I have read from food reviews. The price was definitely not worth being paid for such bad portioning. Darlie was totally unhappy about it. He was grumbling about everything in the restaurant. Everything. I was okay with the place except the food. Yes, I am very particular when it comes to food. Environment wise, I am still able to accept.

Well, definitely we didn’t let the bad food get the best out of us. In the end we ended up with a spontaneous plan of watching a movie. It was pretty close to midnight already. I know that it would be a little difficult for me as I have a curfew to be back home before 1am or I will receive countless calls from my mum but I decided to take the risk to spend time with him.

Guess what? The movie was quite a disappointment as well. What a day…

Oh! I missed out another part. We exchanged gifts. I gave him a box of homemade chocolate chip cookies with 4 types of nuts; macadamia, pecan, cashew and almonds. It was 2 days before my korea trip and I knew I would not be able to spend Valentine’s Day with him and decides to give him an early V-day gift. In return, I received a Chinese New Year gift. He was supposed to mail it to me but I sort of not gave my home address. But oh well, I prefer to received it by hand from him. It’s a much better feeling hehe.

I reached home safely and said our goodbyes in the car.

“Okay lah, reach already. Bye bye and good night”, he said and gave a pat on my shoulder.

Well, I gave him a hug back in return for that pat. Generous much of me? *LOL*. Just kidding. But it was a pretty embarrassing one I would say. I couldn’t reach him properly as there was a big gap in between us and he was still having his seat belt on. My head could only reach his chest and he patted my face. Oh dear! But it’s okay, I get to lay my head on his chest and it felt so warm. Corny me.

I had a huge smile and hopefully mum did not notice or was being suspicious about my smile. I opened my gift and was totally touched. He made me a homemade card as well. And c’mon, how many people these days would make a handmade card for you? Prove me wrong if I am.

To conclude, it was definitely a very good date for me. I really did enjoyed it and Thank you, Darlie, for all your efforts! I know that you were super tired after the whole day and stop denying that you weren’t!

xoxo,

-Latte-

The first suspicion;

I don’t know but somehow I would just admit that I read people’s face quite well. I am not boasting. During the first meet up with Darlie, I noticed that he was staring at me quite often despite it wasn’t me who was talking. Wouldn’t it be strange when someone else is talking and the eyes isn’t locked to that person but me instead? So I was feeling a little awkward at first but just returned a smile. Then later, I saw it in his eyes; it wasn’t something normal nor freaky. But there was something that those eyes were trying to tell me.

Later, on one random evening, I received a call. It was from Darlie. I was never a phone person. I do not call nor receive calls unless it was an emergency. So I was pretty curious why would Darlie call me up randomly when we barely even knew each other that well. But I answered it anyway.

“Hello. Yes, anything?”, I asked.

I guess that somehow freaked him out by me being the cold beast. But anyway, I was more freaked out myself as when he replied saying that he just finished class and was in the bus going home. Even more curious of why is he calling me still. As we talked about random stuff, I find that it is not so bad after all getting a call from a friend once in awhile.

***

On one bright and sunny morning, I received a text from Darlie.

“Bonjour mon Beau, ….”, - the text.

I was stunned immediately. I did not need my 30minutes process of waking up as I was instantly awake when I saw that message. Literally in French, that sentence would only be used to a lover/couple. After much thoughts into it, I realized that in direct translation it means, ‘Good morning, handsome!’ or in Cantonese, ‘zhou san, leng zhai!’.

***

The text flow increased day by day without me noticing. Receiving morning call texts everyday without fail I would say. But of course, sometimes I would be the one sending those morning call texts instead.

Ooh la la!

It is the start of something new…?

xoxo…

-Latte-

The first meet up;

It was just a couple of weeks before Chinese New Year and Darlie was hoping if we could meet up during the break period but knowing that I, on the other hand would be busy, would not possibly have the time to meet up. And so I proposed, why not meet up the next day, which was a public holiday (Thaipusam). He agreed in the end.

We decided to meet up at Mid Valley at 12.30pm. I reached there earlier as my only source of transport was that early. I bumped into that blogger friend of mine, the one who introduced me to Darlie. What a coincidence and somehow rather freaky! We didn’t talked for long, barely even a minute as I was rushing to the toilet.

Later I received a call from Darlie and he was informed by the blogger friend that we met and asked if I would like to join for lunch. I agreed.

Basically the whole outing period, I didn’t really talked much to Darlie. Oh did I not mentioned that a legend was there too. It was just us four; Me, Darlie, the Tuls and the StrictlyGay. Ok to make it more simpler, I’ll now make the blogger friend, Mr. Wise. So yeah, the Legend was having the spot light of the day, not that I am complaining. But somehow it was rather not the whole point of the outing. But what the heck.

Later did I find out that Darlie and Tuls are actually connected with StrictlyGay. I was rather having a WOW moment.

Darlie had to leave early as he needs to get his mum. So we said our goodbyes and he left.

xoxo,

-Latte-

The New Chapter

Nope, it is definitely not the beginning of my Degree programme but it is definitely a new phase of life that I’m gonna be in.

It is definitely a big challenge for me. I never knew if I was actually ready for a relationship. Would I ever find the right person? Will my biggest issue take place and ruin everything? All in all, there were a lot of doubts when coming to think of myself getting into a relationship.

However, not this time. Some may assume that I could be desperate. Well, I’m not. He appeared into my life very unexpectedly through a mutual friend.

***

It all started out like this;

I knew StrictlyGay just recently (few months ago that is), and later on he came to a point where he realized that he had another friend of his that is almost similar like me. The things we like, our horoscope, being the only child, some of habits, tall, and many more. He kept on going on about him.

To be honest, I never really bothered to get to know who the heck is this ‘second me’. Until one day where my blogger friend popped the question, asking if I’m interested to getting to know my second-self. No harm getting to know a new friend, I thought. And so we got to know each other. Now let me introduce him to you; Darlie.

We started out having the same old mundane and cliche getting-to-know-a-new-friend via msn. I was pretty sick of doing the same old thing for so many times. But then I thought that it was no harm having a new friend. Be it him being good or bad, fate will decide.

So, Darlie and I chatted for the first time and it was just in the early morning where I just woke up. Yeap, I will head to my computer straight to online and most importantly, facebook first. It is my daily routine. Then came a pop out message from Darlie. I was bombarded with tonnes of questions from him regarding the course I was studying. I was rather annoyed as why is he asking so much about my course when he is in another field or why not just go and seek the counselor from my University instead?

I would have to admit that, when I am annoyed with someone, I tend to be this cold hearted beast. So I guess after that incident, I became very cold to Darlie. But at one point, the conversation became rather smooth and pleasant. Then without realizing, the annoyance feeling I once had for him was gone. From that moment, we became friends.

xoxo,

-Latte-